It has come to my attention that I blog in my sleep. Rather, I dream about blogging and wake up convinced that I have blogged. So, my sincerest apologies on the month long hiatus. It was not intentional.
Some of the topics in recent weeks I have thought I blogged on:
- D
- C being gone and the circumstances of his return
- my grandmothers (both)
- my cats
- my birth control
I'm sure there have been other topics as well, but those are the highlights. So, go get your drink and perhaps a snack and settle in for a long(ish) read.
I'll start at the bottom and work my way up.
My Birth Control
I currently have the Mirena IUD/IUC in place. I got it put in January of 2007. It lasts 5 years. It does all sorts of wonderful things, not the least being that it typically causes periods to cease. Strike up the band, that's wonderful news! Another side effect is that it can cause women to gain weight. . . since I'm typically clinically underweight, this was viewed as a positive for me. Well, I have lost weight. . . yet again. (To give you an idea - the end of my senior year of high school, I was a size 8 thanks to my migraine meds. End of my freshman year of college I was a size 7. Leaving the hospital after giving birth to J, I was a size 6 - and wearing clothes from my junior year in high school. Before getting the Mirena, I was a size 5/6 and happy. Now, some of my clothes are 4s and too large.)
Another fun tidbit is the information I learned yesterday - Mirena causes increased levels of anxiety and depression in those women with a previous history. Suddenly I'm having a bad flashback to last fall when I was being called by my nurse practicioner every 8 hours to make sure I was still alive, when I learned I'm horribly allergic to Xanax, and when my then four year-old son was bringing me food during the day and making me eat because he thought I was sick. I was at the point where driving down the road caused me to hyperventillate because every police car was going to pull me over and arrest me. Sitting in the living room was impossible because every car that drove past our house was going to shoot at me through the window. I was afraid to see my husband because I was afraid he was going to leave me or, worse, take J from me.
Now I learn that by birth control may have been a contributing factor to my breakdown. It's made me wary, apprehensive. I'm luckily in a better place mentally, so I'm not afraid. If I hadn't come so far, I have no doubt I'd be trying to remove the implant from my uterus myself.
I'm planning on leaving it in at this point, since I'm a year and a half out from getting it removed anyway. But, it worries me that I wasn't made aware of this before hand, given my history.
My Cats
We have cats. . . lots and lots of cats. We had two, then one showed up and adopted us. My baby died (had her 13 years), then the newest one had kittens. . . inside. So we add four kittens to the two cats. One kitten loses a fight to a dog, so now we have three kittens. We try to get rid of them. Really try. No one will take them. I fall head-over-heels for one. He falls for me. One of the kittens gets pregnant. She is still pregnant. I will deliver or ship her anywhere to get her gone before the kittens are born. And her brother. And their mother. Leaving me with my cuddle bug and our old, sick cat. Want a cat or two or three?
My Grandmothers
One grandmother died five years ago yesterday. I still haven't gotten over that. More accurately, I haven't gotten over the after effects of the death. I had/took the responsibility of telling my great-grandmother (who I am named for) that her daughter had died. That was the longest, saddest hour of my life. I was always closer to my great-grandmother than any grandparent.
My other grandmother just celebrated her 85th birthday. I missed it, since it was scheduled at the same time as my T-ball end of season party (mine was scheduled first). She is not doing well at all. Ever since my grandfather died 17 years ago (three days before my birthday. . . see a trend here?), she's gone down hill. It's not been pretty. She's getting worse every day. It's sadder than being there for my other grandmother's death. So hard to watch.
C (and D)
Came home from his mother's early because he ran out of supplies and she couldn't refill the prescription - couldn't pay the copay, or so she said. Sent him home with another man and no supplies. Part of the arrangement with her getting him for so long and when she did was that she would be responsible for the refills. And, yet again, she says "Jump!" and D asks "how high?" GRRRR
And then I'm the effin' bad guy for wanting him to grow a pair (or at least a spine) when it comes to her. GRRRRRR
There may be more tomorrow . . . if it rains, there surely will. If it doesn't rain, then I may sit in the hammock and blog.
Oh - and today is my 6th wedding anniversary. Six years ago today, we eloped to KY and got married.
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