Last Rant of 2009

I was sick. I had the flu for ten days. I should have been hospitalized. I did not eat for ten days. I have lost lots of weight. I have also lost energy.
J took care of me while I was sick. C was in North Carolina, and D, well, D is why I'm ranting. (the day count is just the days I'm ranting, not of illness)
Day 1: D and J go to assemble furniture for friends. Gone 7 hours. I was in the throes of massive chills, so I did not get out of bed, so no eating or drinking.
Day 2: D goes to work for 9 hours. I don't mind that. But when he gets home and I'm running 103.7, I think taking care of me might have been more prudent than sitting in the living room playing video games with the neighbor while J is in bed with me trying to get me warm and to drink.
Day 3: D works 9 hours, then takes J to a basketball game, leaving me in bed alone again for another 2 hours or so.
Day 4: I wake up at 3:30 puking and it doesnt stop. I end up keeping a Phenergan down and sleeping on the bathroom floor. J finds me. J also is the one who brought me water. D works 9 hours. J has church, and D leaves FIRST to go Christmas shopping with his mother. They go to nine stores and then to Ruby Tuesdays to eat. J was home two hours before D was.
Day 5: Christmas Eve. D works 4 hours. I make it to the couch with J's help. I get guilted by D into attending my parents' Christmas dinner and gift giving. We go, I don't eat, I puke, we open gifts which I promptly forget, and I puke again. D gets mad at me for something my sister did, and we leave. We go home, I puke some more, J and I go to bed, D goes to play video games.
Day 6: Christmas Day. I puke. We open presents. We have no tree. J is super happy with his. I am happy with mine. d seems happy with his. We go to his parents', hoping to miss the food to avoid puking. They waited for us. How nice. I take a nap while they eat. We open gifts. I forget mine. We come home and actually spend the day together.

And now I'm being guilted for the house not being clean. Seriously? I'm being nice. It's hard, but I'm being nice.

Anyway, needed to rant. Wanted it off my chest in 2009 so I don't take it in to 2010.

Sickness and Health

I have the flu. I am miserable. I came down with it last night while D was driving back from South Carolina where he dropped C off with his egg donor. So what does my darling hubby do? He gets home at 11:00, stays up watching tv or something for a while, comes to bed. This morning, I have to drag my miserably sick and shivering motion-sick ass out of bed to take care of J. At noon (after getting up at 11:30), D takes J and they go to help the twins' parents assemble new beds. That was planned, I was supposed to go too. It Janie 6:30, I am put of Aleve, out of drinks, and he won't answer his phone. I asked for Life Water from Kroger and some more Aleve. I can handle the aches and chills, but not the back spasms that result.
Sorry for whining. I will try to focus on silver linings tomorrow.

Today is gonna be a good day

I am actually EXCITED about today. We are all home (kept the kids from school) and are binging on Christmas movies. C leaves tomorrow, so this is kinda the last chance we have to watch any. (C chose to stay with D's parents on the other nights we wanted to watch Christmas movies.)
I am obviously very excited about it, since I am wide awake at 7:00 in the morning. Crazy.
Hope all of you have a great Friday!

Positive Spin

Today was a great day. J had a program at school, and it was very cute. Videoes have been posted on my Facebook page. J hasn't felt well since yesterday, so he came home with me after brunch. Tomorrow I can't afford to have him be sick, since I am supposed to help C's class with their brunch and then go to J's class' pajama party. Tomorrow will be quite the busy day.
More positive things later, but rest assured, they are there!

And on a happier note. . .

I am warm, clothed, able to bathe, well-fed, educated; free to think, feel, speak, and worship as I want. I have more than I deserve in life. I have fun toys and cool gadgets and a wonderful family. What friends I do have are stupendous. My family is all healthy. These are the things I choose to focus on this week. These are the things that bring peace to my heart.

Is it January yet??

So yesterday we went to the in-laws' house. They had all the kids' presents wrapped and stacked by kid. J has the LARGEST in size presents, but I know for a fact they were $40 on sale at Kohl's (it is an ImagiNext boat. He has kinda outgrown that stuff, since he prefers Legos and whatnot, but whatever.) One of his is a calendar. Each kid gets five gifts this year. C has a smaller sized pile, but one of his five is a new Nintendo DSi. Another is games for the DSi. The DSi was $150, an the games are $25 each. J asked for a DSi too. He, the more responsible of the boys, was told he is too young. Riiiiight. More like, C has to get preferential treatment.
I am so sick of this bullshit. I'm ready to skip it altogether.

Brave New World

Oh boy! I'm now able to blog from my phone! Maybe this means I will blog more frequently. Or not.

Let's see. . . my foot is killing me, my husband is frustrating me, my stepson is driving me crazy, and my son is testing my patience.

My family and my in-laws are making my holiday season miserable, and this year we apparently aren't even putting up a tree in our house?!? WTF?

I don't talk to anyone anymore, and I miss the adult interaction, but not enough to spur myself to actually do anything about it. When I do spend time with people, it's in settings that don't allow for much talking. I think I'm depressed, and it wouldn't shock me in the least to find that to be true. I hate cold weather, I dislike this holiday season, and I am easily frustrated by how materialistic by children are encouraged to be by other adults.

On the positive side, we are all healthy, well fed, and provided for. We are aggrevated by those we love, which means they are around and taken for granted enough that we feel that way. I know I am blessed more than I deserve, and that things are not as dire as I would make them seem, but sometimes it's hard to rise above the grey misty fog and see the bright clear sun.

brief update

I broke my toe, twisted my knee, rearranged the entire house, canceled tv service, haven't decorated for Christmas, haven't shopped for Christmas, haven't bought or sent Christmas cards, didn't get a job. . . .

C leaves the 19th. School is out on the 18th.

That's about all I can get motivated to post.